Knives
by Dark Duchess and Shadow Queen
Summary: She had used her knives on others, but this was the first time she had turned them on herself. Maiko


A/N: Duchess: Me bored. Me had idea. Me write it down. Me post. Me feel better. K? K. OK. We're good. You understand now. I'll get on with the story.

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Mai struggled to keep tears from her eyes. She couldn't cry in public (she couldn't do anything in public) and she was so used to restraining herself that she wouldn't allow herself to cry anywhere. Why couldn't they see that she was constantly beating herself up? She picked up one of her knives off of her vanity table. She stared at it and thought of all the people she had hurt with it. People with families, lives. Feelings. Feelings she didn't have. She often wondered if she was able to feel anything anymore. But now was the time to find out. The moment of truth.

She laughed to herself at the irony. Truth? What did she know about truth? She lied to everyone: her parents, Ty Lee, Zuko, random courtiers. Anyone who had ever asked her how she was. And to whom she always responded to with the false answer of "fine."

She gently laid the knife on the porcelain skin of her wrist. She observed how the tones of her skin and the metal clashed. The Fire Nation girl closed her eyes and drew the knife across her flesh hard.

13

Mai hurried through the hallways of the palace at Ba Sing Se. Azula had called for her and Mai didn't want to further upset the already-upset Princess. Well, Azula didn't look upset but Mai had known her for so long, Azula's thoughts were as clear to her as her own. Most of the time, Mai didn't particularly care for Azula's thoughts but she still knew them. Thinking about such things, she didn't realize Prince Zuko had just turned the corner. Not watching where she was going, she crashed right into him. They collided and fell to the floor in a mess of limbs.

"Oh, Prince Zuko! I'm so sorry," Mai apologized as she scrambled to her feet. She helped him, causing the sleeve of her shirt to ride up a bit. She looked up at the scarred prince's face, expecting him to be looking at her's. Instead, his attention was focused on the small expanse of skin on her wrist that was a mess of angry red welts. She moved her sleeve back to its previous position, hiding the cuts. Zuko grabbed the base of her hand and forced her sleeve up to her elbow, revealing all of the cuts. Their eyes met; hers full of pain, his full of confusion.

"Why are you doing this, Mai?" he asked, his voice full of concern.

"What do you care?" she responded, wrenching her arm out of his grip before turning and walking away.

13

"You're late," Azula snapped as Mai walked into the throne room.

"I'm sorry," Mai said softly, her thoughts on her recent exchanging of words with Zuko. She didn't notice Azula looking at her with her head cocked to the side, a smirk on her face.

"It seems that my brother has been paying you quite a lot of attention, don't you think?" the princess suggested slyly.

"Huh?"

"Yes. I wouldn't be surprised if he was thinking of taking you as his wife." At this statement, Mai just blinked.

"... WHAT?!"

"Well, you are both of age to be married," Azula said simply, as if it was a conversation they had every day. Mai looked at Azula with alarm. "Plus, when we get back to the Fire Nation, Father will probably want him to take a wife. You're of noble birth, and Zuko is rather fond of you. It's the perfect match."

"But what of Mai's feelings for him?" Ty Lee asked as she cart-wheeled over to the two.

13

Mai sighed deeply as she got back to her room. She was totally stressed from her conversations with the Royal Siblings (a.k.a. The Royal-Pains-in-the-Ass). But she knew of a stress-reliever that she happened to be almost addicted to. She picked up the knife...

And a hand caught her wrist. She turned around to found herself face-to-face with none other than Royal-Pain-in-the-Ass Number 1, Zuko.

"Don't." That was all he said. Then he hit one of the pressure points there, causing her to drop the knife. It clattered to the ground, the only noise in the suffocating silence. After what seemed like hours, Zuko broke it.

"I can't stand seeing you hurt yourself," he whispered softly as he pulled her into his embrace. It was all too much for Mai. She began to sob onto his shoulder and he just held her. And together they forgot the world.

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OK, that really sucked but I still wanna post it. The little inspiration fairies gave me this idea and it would be oh so rude to not share it with the world. OK. Reviews make me happy, which will get me off this angst-kick I've got going on.


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